t is 2 o'clock on 18th January and I am heading to the delivery suite! Cant believe it! This is it now I am going to finally meet my little miracle!

I went in to room number 8. It was a yellow room and the lighting was very low and it had a nice relaxed feel about it. I was welcomed by a midwife called Jenny who was really nice and she was 30 weeks pregnant too! She explained all what was going to happen and I got settled in.

At three o clock a doctor came in and I had my waters broke and was then put on a monitor so they could keep an eye on the baby's heartbeat. What a weird feeling that was! I was sat on a rocking chair and I felt like i was wetting myself!! was very funny!

They left me for an hour to see if by having my waters broke whether that would bring on the labour naturally but unfortunately it didn't. I was then put on a hormone drip to help bring on the contractions. This was increased every half hour.

By six the contractions were coming quite heavy and my hormones were starting to go mad! I suddenly became really emotional. I had been so calm up until now and i think reality had just kicked in. Jenny was great though! She kept talking to me and asking what was wrong and was i worried about anything. She brought me in some aromatherapy oils to help me to relax and they helped me calm down.

Half seven came and i was now in full labour! The contractions were getting really painful so i moved from my rocking chair on to the bed and asked for the gas and air! I couldn't cope on my own anymore. Mum was being great she was reassuring me that i was doing well and she had my music playing to help me to stay relaxed. Also it was change over for the shift so i said goodbye to Jenny and Jo came and joined us. She was very nice so i didn't mind The next few hours seem to be a blur for me! I was in a lot of pain and i was constantly sucking on my gas and air. Eventually i asked when it would be possible for me to have an epidural as i didn't feel like i could go on in anymore pain. Jo said that she felt i was doing really well so would give me an examination and see how far gone i was before she could say about the epidural.

After an examination i found out that i was now 7cm dilated!! wow things really were progressing but i still had another 3cm to go before i could start pushing! How long was that going to take! Apparently you dilate a cm every hour! Three more hours of this pain! No way!! it was time for more drugs! Only something happened in the next ten mins! I went on to the next stage of labour! I had dilated another cm and Jo said that it was now too late for me to have any more pain relief as it would not start working in time before Squidge was born!! oh Great!

This was it! Time to start pushing!! i was so proud of myself! I wasn't swearing or shouting like i thought. In fact Jo kept asking what was happening as i was really quiet? I was gritting my teeth and hoping for it to be over soon!

Thats when things started getting complicated! The baby's heartbeat kept dropping and there were signs that it was getting distressed and tired! It didn't matter how much i tried to push i could not get my baby out! I need to have some help i then had a doctor talking to me but it was hard to concentrate on what she was saying as i was in so much pain!! the next thing i knew i had my legs up and the end of the bed had been taken away. They explained to me that they had to use the ventouse which is a suction to help get the baby out. The doctor had the most annoying voice and kept telling me when to push and when i couldn't and i remember wanting to shout at her to shut up! Ha ha i know now that she was actually really good and in fact she was great and really got me motivated to get Squidge out!

The whole time i was in labour i had my eyes shut and i was concentrating on getting through it the best way possible but then i heard the doctor say something that scared the hell out of me. “can you get the respirator ready” !!! why??? what was wrong with my baby!!! my eyes shot open and i shouted why!! why do you need that?

I was reassured that whenever they use the forceps or ventouse that they need to have that ready as they are rushing the baby in to the world and so there fore may have breathing difficulties but that there was nothing to worry about. From then on i was really scared!

I then felt an really weird feeling and a huge pain! The head was out!! now for the shoulders!! one more push and that was it!!

11.32 my baby was here!! my mum was crying and screaming to me that it was a boy! I was in shock! I didn't know what to do or think! Was he ok?

Jo handed me my little boy and i was just so happy that he was finally here and that everything was fine.

I held him in my arms and he just looked up at me. It was the most amazing feeling in the world!! Hello Squidge!!

he was then taken away to be weighed... 8lb 13oz!! wow!! that was a good weight!! he was just so long!

I couldn't believe it! This is it!! finally all my dreams have come true.. i was sat holding my baby, my little miracle! He was gorgeous!! the most precious, special little boy in the world!!